Feedback

Getting feedback that is less than complimentary stings so much. I am fond of saying feedback is a gift but boy, at times like this, it sticks in my craw.

I’ll be fine. The silver lining here is that the feedback which has me in my feelings is actionable. I can work with that.

Blessings

I recently came into some unexpected funds and it was the best experience of my life to be able to bless my family from the bounty. This experience has cemented for me things that fill up my cup. Helping others that I care about in any way that I can makes me feel whole. I hope you are being a blessing to others.

New thresholds

It’s hard to believe that it is April 2021. Time is flying by and at the same time, feels like I’m on pause. Nevertheless, this year is proving to be equal parts challenging and surprising

For the second time ever, I rated myself as a high performer and my employer agreed! I also had the added bonus of earning a promotion which was a wonderful cherry on top for me. It comes with a pretty decent raise which puts me in the range for E5 engineers on levels.fyi

This new role requires an additional set of skills that I am still working on but I’m incredibly excited. My manager is in my corner and I cannot express how this promo would not have happened without here. Thank you, Z.

Grateful

What a year.

I’ll start off with some good news: I got a raise! It caps off a pretty rough year but one where I never stopped giving my best. I really love where I work and I am looking forward to another year!

Grateful that I am getting more financially stable as I’ve gotten older. I’m behind the retirement 8-ball still but no longer by a lot. I can absorb unexpected bills and put things on autopay. I feel very fortunate and blessed to be able to satisfy most of my needs.

Grateful for my body. I went through a dark phase of not caring about her and this year saw me wake up out of my stupor and start paying more attention. I’m not any skinnier but I’m hardier and can hike 20 miles on a dime. I shit you not. 😅

Review season

My employer does something very unusual. Instead of waiting till the end of the year to deliver a final review, we have mid year reviews.

At first, I felt weirded out by this and even more weirded out by our practice of having peer reviews! I was filled with anxiety around what people would think of me and of going through a judgement cycle.

I have now gone through this process about 3 times now and I can confidently say that my fears about it being a judgement cycle were unfounded. Rather than fear the thoughts of my peers, I found that I’ve become excited and keen to learn what people think about me! Not just the good parts but the parts that I could use some growing on too. Furthermore, I look at mid year reviews as an opportunity to take a bit of break and truly reflect on exactly what your hustle and bustle achieved.

Engaging in this review process requires brutal honesty with oneself and a willingness to hear the good and the bad. I’m a constant work in progress but I continue to be thrilled with my progress in the arena of confronting my fears. 🤗

Hot summer

I’ve been enjoying the summer evenings in Utah. My routine used to be lunch and evening walks but the sweltering days have ensured that I can only do evening walks now. It’s honestly become one of the best parts of my day now. Our evening walks have morphed into night hikes and it’s incredibly invigorating to be out in nature when it’s dark with your senses on high alert. It also means we’ve spotted more animals out and about! My favorite sighting happened a few weeks ago when we spotted what we believe to be elk. It was a humbling sight. 珞

Earlier this year, my employer got acquired and the closing hasn’t officially happened yet. It’s so close yet so far and it’s blowing my mind a little bit that if/when it goes through, I’ll have a small windfall coming my way. I feel incredibly fortunate and said windfall is also very timely. I’ve been working with my siblings back home to spruce up our family and any extra funds I can spare will go a long way. Here’s hoping for the regulatory gods to provide their stamps of approval. 爛

I bought a scale. Not for weight loss but data tracking. M and I got some Garmin devices (Garmin 45 and 645) to capture all sorts of information (sleep tracking, heart rate, activities, etc). Part of me is quite fascinated that I’m the lightest I’ve been in a while despite objectively consuming more and without me meaning to. I think it’ll be important for me to use the scale to make sure I’m not losing all my muscle. For weight tracking, I bought the Weight Guru scale which is the perfect set-it-and-forget-it scale. All I do is step on it and it syncs my information over to Google Fit and the Weight Guru app! Pretty nifty!

It’s almost midnight now and I’m icing my feet after a 6 mile evening walk. I wouldn’t trade my status right now for anything in the world (except the chance to see my dad again).